When you put your everything into a relationship and they turn around and try to break you, you become so wounded, so broken that you learn to fight, to endure, and to love unconditionally. You feel weaker than ever before because you have shown them your weakness and your vulnerabilities.
You hate the way they make you feel, you hate that they have made you rely on them and love them. You hate how your love has resulted in weakness and loss of all reasoning.
We all carry parts of our broken pieces with us as a reminder of where we were once, what we came out of. It reminds us of the love we felt once but also the pain that came with it, the insecurities and the lies, the loneliness and the brokenness.
I will always carry a piece of you in my heart but not because I still love you, it is because you remind me of who I was and how much I lost.
So thank you for breaking me!
Thank you for the pain you caused me, because like gold it in heat, it made me shine brighter.
Thank you for the lessons you taught me each time your boot kicked my body, each time my face was broken, each time a bloody tear fell and each time you threw me across the floor. In the dark cold floor I was not alone. My tears were caught in a bottle, my sigh was forever recorded, my pain was rated in Gods book.
I thank you because in my brokenness, I was able to grow, transform and morph into the new me. The tears taught me to wait for tomorrow as "...the Sun of Righteousness shall rise with healing in His wings...” (Malachi 4:2 NKJV)
The lies taught me to put my trust in the LORD, the only one who never betrays me, who never hurts me, who loves me unconditionally... “But blessed are those who trust in the LORD and have made the LORD their hope and confidence.” (Jeremiah 17:7 NLT)
The pain of losses, the loneliness and shame all took me back to the one I left for you, my childhood God who was my best friend. "O Lord, you alone are my hope. I’ve trusted you, O LORD, from childhood.” (Psalm 71:5 NLT)
Thank you for bringing me back to my childhood friend, my first love, my God. Your beatings made me stronger and taught me to fight. Each drop of blood shed from my broken lips and torn body remind me of the blood He shed for me. "for this is my blood, which confirms the covenant between God and his people. It is poured out as a sacrifice to forgive the sins of many.” (Matthew 26:28 NLT)
You tested my innocent love. You broke my body. Thank you because it reminds me of a body that was broken and given for me. “And He took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is My body which is given for you; do this in remembrance of Me.” Luke 22:19 NKJV)
I tried to forget you, but you show up uninvited every day reminding me of who I have become, a resilient, strong woman, a survivor, yet still delicate like an exquisite silk scarf. You haven’t hardened me you have made me wise and compassionate.
Thank you, because as you broke me you released my fragrance. What I have gained is far greater than what I have lost. So thank you for making me stronger, wiser and a true worshiper of Christ.
The pain you gave me had a higher purpose.
(The book; "Breaking the Alabaster is coming out soon, watch for it on Amazon)